Five Keys to Empowering Yourself with Love

I have been contemplating this idea of self-love more. It’s so simple, and yet so hard to attain. Really being able to look yourself in the eye, and say… I love you. I love you, your flaws, your perfections, your failures, and your victories. It can be so difficult to really see yourself in all those phases, and still really appreciate who, and what you are.

I know I struggle with this. I know you struggle with it. We all do. It’s something that we feel at one time or another. Some of us daily. Some of us feel the struggle of self-love in waves. There are things that help make self-love easier, and other things will spiral it out of control and turn all our pain into very real monsters.

Here are 5 keys to help you on your journey to connecting and honoring yourself more!

Key Number One: Stay Committed to Yourself.

Regardless of how low you feel, or how lost you may seem; your commitment to yourself will be the lantern in the darkness. The simple willingness to uphold yourself, to listen to yourself, to do what is best for yourself… will put you in the right situations!

It isn’t always easy to stay committed to yourself. Sometimes you will let down your guard, casting yourself into something that you know wont make you feel better. But you have to try don’t you? Because you are brave and strong… and that’s how you learn!

Just stay strong! Hang on with all your might.

Key Number Two: Allow Yourself to Be Dark

The darkness is part of you. Don’t hide from your shadow, don’t run from it, and don’t be afraid of it. It isn’t your enemy. It is your friend. Your shadow allows you to learn so much about who you are, what you’re made of and how much you can, and will take!

Whenever you feel dark, just dance! Dance to whatever rhythm you feel. Whatever song you hear playing. Just close your eyes and let go to the beat of it all!

That is one of the best ways to learn to love yourself. If you trust yourself to dance you will feel sexier, stronger, more vibrant. You will seduce the dark! 

Key Number Three: Learn to Say No

If you don’t like it… don’t do it! Do not feel responsible for anyone else if it isn’t for your best wellbeing. We spend so much time saying yes to things that we don’t really want to do. We feel guilted into living life a certain way.

I always ask myself: does this feed my spirit, or does it defeat my spirit?

If it doesn’t feed your spirit then you should just move on to the next thing! Don’t get stuck in the mindset that if you say no, you will miss out on something. You don’t miss out on opportunities that are good for you, by saying no to things that feel wrong.

In this big, beautiful Universe… all you have to do to get what you want and need is be you, love you, and smile!

Key Number Four: Daily Life Can Be Exciting

Every single day can be awesome. It can be filled with great things. Don’t wait your whole life for the right person, the right place, the right time… do it now. Live it now. Don’t only do what you love when everything else is “taken care of”. Don’t live your life for vacation, retirement, or the weekends.

This moment right now is perfect! You are beautiful enough to shine right now. So go out there and say what you need to say. Start planting the seeds of your dreams. And water them with lots of love. Because the truth is… you have time to love yourself!

Each moment you spend on anything… you should first take a second to love yourself. It’s easy to forget. But it’s a powerful affirmation, and catalyst of change.

Key Number Five: Self-Love is Self-Healing

You may not always feel strong. You may feel like you are losing a battle with something… it creeps into us now and again! You may not have the energy to do what you want, or what you need. But find just a little, tiny space to be good to yourself.

Because when you are good to yourself… you will also begin to heal yourself. You will heal yourself of all the pain, the upset, the damage, the loss… all the things that make you feel fragmented will begin to heal.

Some things will take longer than others. But it is all rooted in your belief. And your commitment to yourself… remember that!

Here are a few prompts for you. Post, comment or tweet your reply with #SelfLoveFest

Self-trust is a form of self-love. In what ways have you learned to trust your inner knowing?

Being mindful and aware are forms of self-love. How can you be more mindful and live in the present moment?

Acceptance is a form of self-love and the first step to taking charge of your life. What parts of your life could use some acceptance?

© Shaheen Miro 2015

It’s February… Love is in the Air!

Love is something that comes up so often in my sessions, and even in my personal life with friends and family. There is this constant conversation happening among people about how to love, when to love, where to find love, how to keep love, and on and on it goes. It’s all pretty power, pretty beautiful, and some times heavy!

Something that is usually left out of the conversation is self-love. I know… crazy right! We want love from other people, we want to give love to other people… but we struggle to love ourselves. But when you begin to look at self-love, you will find a pivotal point of power. 

What does that mean?

Well, when you want something in your life (like love, acceptance and romance) you have to also practice those things. And the best way to do that is to cultivate a space in your own life for you to give to yourself.

You see, self-love is not selfish it is actually the opposite. When you practice self-love you are filling yourself up with vibrant, beautiful energy, and you are planting a seed of intention, to not only give love, but to receive love, to feel love, and to live in love. That seed of intention will take root, sprout and blossom into the world, creating a powerful space for you to share the sweet nectar of love with others.

Isn’t it amazing how simple that is? By loving yourself, you begin to thrive… growing into an empowered person. Growing into an authentic person. And by simply being you, in a state of love (our natural state), you can give unconditional love to everyone else.

Because without self-love you have no acceptance, and without acceptance of yourself you begin to have limits, and with limits comes your personal edge… and that edge will be tested so many times by people and situations in your life. If you make self-love one of your truths, then nothing can shake you when your edge creeps up to challenge you!

Here are a few affirmative questions to ask yourself throughout the month!

It would be powerful to journal with these questions, or create affirmations from them.

  1. What self-loving act do you do every day?
  2. Stand in front of the mirror. What do you love most about your face? Name as many as you wish.
  3. What food when you eat it feels like an act of self-love?

Join in the Self-Love Fest of February!

We would love to hear your thoughts, comments and answers!!

Tweet, comment, or respond on Facebook, and use #SelfLoveFest

Stay tuned for more information throughout the month!

© Shaheen Miro 2015

Happy Thanksgiving: #RantGratitude

Hi Beautiful People!

The last few days have been absolutely magical. So many wonderful things have begun to come into being. I keep experiencing synchronicities right and left, and I feel so in alignment with the Universe. When things “click” like this it is surreal! 

I had to stop for a moment and just take in all the good energy. While everything is expansive and in motion I have to be still. Grounded in this moment. Present in this experience. Being completely appreciative of everything that is happening around me. 

Honestly… I feel drunk with gratitude! And really gratitude is the foundation of consciously manifesting. Gratitude is the heart of the law of attraction. If you aren’t grateful for what you’ve received in your life, then you’ve signaled to the Universe that you aren’t aware of the miracles in front of you.

It is so easy to get caught up in daily life. Lost in our heads, our jobs, or responsibilities. The chaos takes over. But gratitude doesn’t need big bells and whistles. Just a simple nod of thanks. A quiet smile. A little dance.

I decided I need to give myself space to be grateful daily. So I am challenging myself to a list of things I am grateful for each week.

I urge you to do the same!

This is the #RantGratitude  Challenge!!

Join me! Rant what you’re grateful for. Each day, or once a week… Leave it in the comments.

Share something daily on Twitter.

Use #RantGratitude 

Lets create one big vortex of awesome energy through giving thanks for the awesomeness of the Universe and our spirits.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

<3

#RantGratitude

© Shaheen Miro 2014

Thanksgiving Giveaway!!

Happy Thanksgiving!! I hope you have amazing plans with friends and family. Get out there spread love and gratitude for the beautiful things in your life. It’s important that we always send out love and thanks for all the blessings we have… and to even bless the negative things in our lives because they serve as teachers on our path.

The more you send out love and gratitude, the more you create abundance!

This year has been crazy, exciting, and has allowed me to befriend my light and shadows. I am so thankful for all the love and good energy I have around me. I am so thankful for all the beautiful people I have met, and that I am sure to meet. AND I am so thankful for all the fabulous souls I meet right here!! 

As a thank you… I want to do a giveaway for everyone who visits me here!

Please, leave a comment below expressing something you are thankful for. And share one way that you intend to give back all the blessings you have received this year. I want to hear from you… I want to hear what sort of blessings and magic exist in your life! 

Follow me (if you don’t already) and leave a comment to be entered into the drawing for a FREE email reading!

There will be 3 winners. 

Feel free to share this post :-)

I will announce the winners on Sunday 12/1. 

Much love,

Shaheen

Dangerous Love

13837_168322376355_535481355_3379155_6155065_n“The dangerous thing about love is you give a part of yourself away. You give that person a piece of your heart, and you can never get it back again. That’s the beautiful, tragic price of love. Even when it ends… it truly lives on in some mystical place. Time and distance cannot erase what was, or be shifted by what will be. Love is a permanent and ever-changing being. ” -Shaheen

 

No matter how this story ends, it began in love. I felt so beautiful in your eyes and arms. You took me to the mountains. You whispered me love songs. You danced me across rooms, my eyes closed, nothing but the scent of you and your heartbeat. I know we had a love that only comes once in a life. If it’s over now… it still lives on somewhere. Where I was loved, I was home. I hope that you know.

No matter where you go, whomever you choose again to love, just know that you were the one. I will always have a place for you in my heart. There will always be an invisible silver band on the ring finger of my left hand. And you will always be handsome and precious to me… even when years have passed. And when we are old, I hope we can hold hands and say… we are the best of friends.

For now we can be silent. We can circle around our feelings. We can touch faintly on what really is. You can say you are moving on, and I can say I just don’t care. I can secretly cry, and you can secretly be lost out there. Just know if there comes a night, when the day has been too hard, you can’t handle anymore harsh words, and you need to come home… the right side of my bed will be opened for you. Crawl in by the light of the moon and lay down your sorrow to me. I will love you.

I mourn the loss of love that was snuffed out before it could really begin. We were children in love… so much to grow and learn. We had the world in our hands. You threw it away. I know it was in fear, and nothing else. I know now I did nothing wrong. And I know you still love me. But why did you run from me. What could I have done to make you stay? Why did both of our hearts have to break this way? We had a love strong enough to brave the storm.

But I flung myself hard against the storm, and I shattered once again. I’m not really sure if we can leave here with something warm. Unless we remember that they flames of love never really die. There will come a night, when you slip out of your shell, and you fall deep into the glow of my eyes. You will tell me everything. You will fall in love again. You will realize what is missing. And you will want it back.

No one can fill us up in the same way. No one can see the beauty in your flaws. No one can love me enough to make me calm. We were supposed to be. We are meant to be. You are my everything… and one night you will wake up with a stranger and wonder where you’re husband has gone. And I will be there… somewhere trying to sleep again. Come home, baby.

© Shaheen Miro 2013

 

Love Letter: Valentines’ Day Tips for Love

Dear Gypsies,

I know everyone’s looking for love! People ask about it all the time in readings, “When will I get married?”, “Where’s mr/mrs. Right”, “Will I ever date again?”, etc. And I totally understand, we all want to feel loved, and connected. Everyone want’s to share there life with someone, their hopes and dreams, their fears. It’s natural to want a companion, someone to partner. So what’s the secret?

Well, I don’t know the secret to having the relationship of your dreams, but I do have some tips that everyone can benefit from.

3 Ways to Bring Love Into Your Life:

1. Love yourself! Oh how cliche, but it’s true. You have to invest time and energy into yourself. You need to be your own best friend, explore your interest and hobbies, express your hopes and fears to yourself. And dream out loud. Who’s to say you can’t have a nice evening alone, or have a fabulous dinner by yourself? I love going out alone… dinner and a good book, or my journal! It’s all about perspective. If you can’t be open with yourself, you wont be open with anyone else!

2. Relationships do not fill holes! So many people want to find love so they can fill a hole inside of them. They have this ache, this loneliness, this sense of grieving for something they don’t have. But guess what? Relationships aren’t meant to fix you, they are meant to compliment you. If you can’t shine bright on your own, then you’ll be nothing more than a dull glow in a relationship. Begin a relationship as a way to enhance your vibrance, your balance, and your independence.

3. Step outside of your comfort zone! This sounds simple, right? This is the misstep of most people seeking love. A potential relationship could hit you on the head, but if you aren’t stepping out of your “zone” and opening up to new experiences… you’ll miss it! And, there are those that think a new relationship should just knock on the front door! It’s not gonna happen! You have to put in the effort. The Universe partners with you when you make a shift in energy… but you can’t have change, if you’re not willing to change. Love comes to those who are adventurous. That doesn’t mean you need to hunt love down, it means that you need to be open to new scenery, new people, new experiences. Be spontaneous. You never know when you’ll fall in love!

Happy Valenties day… I hope it’s filled with magic. Remember to tell someone you love them!

Ooh, PS, light a fresh red candle for romantic love and make your wishes of a future mate. Light a fresh pink candle for general love. This will fill the air with good energy!

With Love,

Shaheen

Fire Light

Owner, Dudva.

We came here faithful and wild eyed. Looking for answers as the smoke made rings around their heads. They were forgotten angels, forged in the heat and pressure of another storm. Beyond your memory is hidden a history far greater than can be told in words.

I lit a candle, burned it for 3 days to heal the pain. The color was liquid red and hot like the sweat that ran down your face as I was leaving. You were begging for change, and yet I had changed long before you knew. Why do they forsake the ones they love?

So they sing. They sing as the dark falls around them. A gentle cloak of raven black. There you can hear the words being whispered to silhouettes of strangers. Faces of marionettes suspended from memories. Make me up how you want to. Make them believe I was nothing and you were everything.

He wanted badly to touch the heart of the mystery. A dangerous soul who would rage against the gods. Fire could rain down. Prayers couldn’t protect him. There’s not map to guide you as you slip away into your own misery. Mock them as you run. They will taunt you. We can still pray… even though prayers are useless now.

If I can wake up and breathe again. Does that mean none of it was real? I might just be another memory. She said the white doves are calling to us now. We can walk on the edge of what was, and what will be. We can dance with the dead to feel alive again. There’s no shame in burning a candle… even if it can’t drown out the night.

I whisper one more time before its over. I touch my lips gently to the flame. Kissing the fire. Another form of passing. Wind catches light and pushes it into oblivion. A fragile soul is lost to the dark again. Snuffed out. No more light. No more life. I hope the prayers still burn brightly on the other side.

© Shaheen Miro

LGBT Pride

Cyndi Lauper at NYC Pride!

The month of June is LGBT pride, and Cincinnati’s pride happens to be this weekend. Sadly I am unable to go, but I want to mention how amazing it is to have such a celebration here! All around the world awareness is trying to be brought to people to teach love and ACCEPTANCE! It’s so moving when people look at other people as equals, instead of judging them by their color, income, sexuality or status. I think Pride is an opportunity for people to not only educate themselves, but to also have fun!

The battle for equal rights for the LGBT community has been on going and unless you live under a rock, you’ve heard about it. I read one person’s comment the other day on a Gay Rights article that really moved me… they said, “What are Gay Rights? Doesn’t rights imply that they are for everyone?!” I couldn’t agree more. How can a government and society pick and choose who gets what rights? It’s either all or nothing. If a man and woman can get married, then why can’t a man and a man or a woman and a woman?

It’s silly to me that people feel the need to take away the rights and the livelihood of a group of people because they don’t agree with it. I think people need to stop being so judgmental and be more accepting. You don’t have to agree with a life style to allow someone else to live it. You don’t have to be a vegetarian to allow someone else to be. You don’t have to like hip hop music to allow someone else to.The point being that if you don’t like it, then don’t do it. You have no right to stop others from doing what makes them happy, as long as it isn’t harming anyone (hurting your ego, doesn’t count).

Go out into the world today, everyday and be loving and open…. you will be amazed at how happy you can be, by letting others be who they are!

All the best!

Shaheen

Story: Karen The Bus Monitor

Almost a week ago I found this horrible video of this older woman, Karen Klein, a 68-year-old woman from New York who is a bus monitor. The video was filmed by a few teenage boys who proceeded to harass her for about 10 minutes. They called her names, degraded her, used her personal history and appearance against her, and even physically assaulted her. The video was sad, cruel and depressing. It made me cry and question society.

Mortified by the brutal hell ride that his woman had to endure, I thought a bout it for a few days. It made me angry and sad, and it made me think how upset I would be if my grandmother or mother was put in that position. No one should endure that kind of abuse. These children were finding pleasure in her pain, and it makes me wonder why our society is filled with people who are so abusive toward people they see as “weak” or “different”.

Karen showed courage and strength in the face of objectivity. She showed her true colors and never lost composure. Many people in such a situation would have been pressured to lash out and defend themselves. This woman was brought to tears and one of her few responses to these horrible boys, was, “If you don’t have something nice to say, then you shouldn’t say anything.”

What happen to the days when we respected our elders. Intolerance in our society is growing as respect dwindles. Karen is one of many victims, but her torture was recorded. It was put on the internet as a trophy to show how proud these boys were of degrading her. Then it went viral, and the after math has been touching.

Karen never asked to press charges, she didn’t want the boys to be expelled. She said she thought they weren’t intrinsically bad, but that they needed to be taught a lesson by having their privileges taken away. She was recorded as saying that she just wanted them to realize what they did and never do it to anyone again.

You can watch the video here, if you can stand to, and you can also DONATE to her fund that was established by someone who isn’t even connected to her, to allow her to go on vacation and at this point retire. This woman deserves to be treated. She has opened a social dialogue for us to talk about these issues and has become a face for change.

The amount of donations that Karen has received is staggering. The kindness of people has pulled together and total strangers are reaching out to show her love and support. Please contribute to her cause, even if it’s not a monetary contribution, take to heart her experiences and move past tolerance and embrace the idea of acceptance and respect for your fellow people. See and honor the light inside of each person, and see and honor the light inside of yourself.

Walls Around You

You burn inside, hot and sticky, as these feelings curl up your spine. That person enters your presence and you are melting again, trying to hold your soft parts together. You could be liquid fire in front of him/her. The desire makes you ache… it’s too much.

We all want something, we all long for something. It could be a person or thing… you reach for it, grasping sand, that slips through closed fingers. It is always coming and going, and the feelings are undying. How do you gain composer with such a fever?

Boundaries are essential. You can’t live with them and you cant live without them. I affectionately told my friend the other day, “you can’t have your vodka and drink it too”… or can you. At the end of the day it boils down to what feels right to the ego and what feels right to the soul and how you can discern the two.

I know I have people in my life who walk in and out and they have free rein, and sometimes I shoot myself in the foot for being naïve enough to allow it, but my heart says one thing and my mind says another. You never know what to say in those situations, “Hey old friend, I love you, but you’re hanging around more than I like.” How do you articulate that without coming off like a total jerk?!

Break down the situation into intention. What is your intention with this person? Do you expect to gain something for your lack of boundaries? If you let them do whatever they want to you, do you think they will eventually give you what you want? Are you afraid to upset the peace? Do you think something will click? Will they change? You can’t live your life waiting for rainbows. Hope is a dirty, nasty word because it implies that something is impossible.

Who matters most? Do you have to sacrifice yourself to make this person happy? Or to get what you want? To have that dream job? Are you selling one dream to attain another? Are you feeding your own spirit? You have to look at each situation and know who is the most important person in it… which is YOU. You can be kind hearted, compassionate and giving, and still put yourself first.

When I say put yourself first, I don’t mean in the egocentric sense, I mean in the most loving and positive way. You cannot give to others if you can’t give to yourself… it’s sort of like a garden. If you are growing fruits and vegetables to feed yourself, but give them all away before you get a bite to eat… you’re going to go hungry. Don’t let yourself go hungry. Love yourself. Feed yourself. You will be able to give 110 if you go this route.

Who is holding responsibility? How many times do we get in situations where we give so much away… for a person or a goal and nothing comes back and then we get angry, sad, and guilty? It happens all the time because people place their personal responsibilities in the hands of others. It’s the martyr mentality. People would rather let someone else be responsible for their dreams, hearts and happiness because if things don’t work out, if they are left broken… then they aren’t at fault. BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOURSELF!!

You can see from the other person’s perspective if you want, but no matter how many times you walk in their shoes, you will never be them. You cannot rationalize for people. You cannot get in their heads and try to figure out what you are doing wrong or why they treated you a certain way.

You control the reaction. I think the most powerful piece of wisdom we can all take to heart is, we are in control. You may not be able to change circumstances, move mountains, change peoples minds, manipulate bank accounts… though you would be surprised… but what you can do is control your reaction.

What makes you feel out of control? Is it when you don’t get your way? Maybe its when you feel you look weak? Or embarrassed? Or when you don’t have enough?  Find your point of weakness and let it become your strength.  That becomes you point of power and allows you to gain a sense of control.

If you are in situations that feel icky, sticky and bad, stop for a second and breathe. Ground and center into the moment, call your energy back and release whatever negative feelings you have toward the situation or person. You have to lighten your load so that you can be free to move and grow and fly to whatever places you want.

EXERCISE:

Write your feelings out. Write letters to the place that hurts. If it’s a person, then write to them and tell them all the things you wish you could say to their face. Let the venom out. Be angry, sad or crazy! The page can take it. If it’s something you want or situations you are in then write to that as well… give it a persona and talk about how you feel. Let everything out. Now burn it! Or Flush it down the toilet! Let the old go, you have no need to cling to it. You are releasing this place of resistance to create room for boundaries and protection. You are changing your intention and your reaction.

It’s hard to create these boundaries in life because you want something and you know it’s negative for you. You struggle to see the truth. It’s easy to deny what our soul is trying to show us, but if you stop for a second and ask yourself if you are happy in a situation and hesitate for a second to respond “yes”, then you may need to evaluate what is holding you there.

 

Fear is usually the culprit for unhappiness… we are afraid of something! This gets back to intention. Face your fears. Look them in the eye, with a big F-You and take back your power! Set up a new plan and take a new route.

Lastly, Patience is your friend! We all want, what we want on our terms, in our time and when we don’t get it we get angry… which creates a place of resistance and alters your intention. Stay grounded and centered, and be patient. What you want will come in it’s time… and part of this patience is allowing yourself room to mess up, to be blind, to have to reroute yourself.

Don’t ever regret losing sight of your boundaries… it happens to everyone. What matters is that your eyes have been opened and you are working to better the situation. Get bold gypsies, say what you need to say and be fearless!

And don’t be afraid to reward yourself!

Much love…

Shaheen

© Shaheen Miro