Curious to Dream

Here I am falling curious again. I’ve been pulling at a tiny thread to my dreams… and now it’s unraveling fast. I’ve always known that my dreams would sail if I practiced patience and positive thinking (which is f-ing difficult!). Starshine is elusive; you have to carry a certain feeling in your heart to catch it.

Waiting is deafening. The anticipation entangles you. You become fixed on the feeling of wanting… instead of placing your heart on the feeling of having. If you want to live that dream, you must carry the surreal feeling with you in everyday life.

This really is a matter of fact verses fiction. Many of us have convinced ourselves that dreams are ephemeral. That’s something you hear about in fairy stories… it will never happen to me. Talk about the antithesis to getting what you want! Dreams fall on those who are willing. You can’t catch raindrops, if you wont stick your tongue out.

Try living the dream before it’s even made an appearance.

There is this painful dichotomy that exist between what we want and what we need. We tell ourselves lies that we have to live in the real world, and relegate what we love to the realm of hobbies. Bullshit! You can do whatever you want. You can have your cake and eat it too… if you dare to do so!

Why not make your art your life, isn’t that the most trustworthy way to live?

So many of us believe that you have to be good little boys and girls… give your 40 hours a week to the cubicle gods, and then have fun on the weekends. We have to do what’s right… get college educations, wear suites and ties, carry brief cases. If not, then we’ll just be a bunch of starving artists… living on moonbeams and air!

This whole mindset just makes my skin crawl. We have to banish this nonsense. You have to rage against the “norms”. Fight your negative upbringing. Burn the hell out of those “tapes” that bog you down. If you want to make a change, live your dreams, and really be happy…do it!

Wake up everyday and just know that you are/will do what you love!

Try it out. See where it takes you. The magic is there, just waiting to be called on!

© Shaheen 2013

7 thoughts on “Curious to Dream

  1. While I agree with the positivity of your message, Shaheen, I’d like to point out that it’s easy to say “So many of us believe that you have to be good little boys and girls… give your 40 hours a week to the cubicle gods, and then have fun on the weekends.” when you’re in your early 20s with no mortgage, no spouse and no children. :o) My husband would love to do art full time, but art is not always rewarded in terms of $ (especially if you’re a visionary and/or live in a rural area that thinks a framed poster from Wal-Mart qualifies as “art”). I’m sure you’re familiar with the stories of painters whose art now goes for millions…but died in poverty. Not always is this connected to lack of optimism or magical thinking or even mental illness. Sometimes, it just happens to be a part of a person’s path, what he/she signed up to experience in this life time.

    The most important thing is to MAKE GREAT ART. Period. Even if you may not make a living at it and have to have a boring job to sustain you. Because, chasing money, accolades and acceptance is a sure way to not only make shitty art, but also be a homogenized sell-out in the process. :o)

    • Hey Janet! Thanks for stopping by. Thank you for expressing your opinion. I do agree to an extent. I however don’t feel that age has a whole lot to do with it. Yes in my early 20’s I don’t have a mortgage or a child… but I do have rent, college fees, food, travel, and numerous others things to pay for.

      The point isn’t really that everyone should say the hell with their day job and live the dream… I know tickets aren’t being handed out to everyone! But most people are too afraid to even take the first step. I’m from a very, very, very small town… it’s not even a town, it’s a village. Most people there can’t even see their lives outside of the town. They have no perspective a life bigger than what they’ve seen… and it’s because nothing in them believes that it’s possible. They hold their heads down in defeat accepting their lot in life.

      Your talented husband has done something really wonderful in pursuing his art. And that’s really the heart of the message. The things that we find passion in should be just as important as our jobs. And if we treat it with that kind of importance, then why not make it your “job”.

      I have a bad taste in my mouth from this kind of thinking. And it’s not to say that I wont ever “work for the man”…because I do now as part of my school training. But my intention is to never lose sight of what’s important to me.

      But I do agree… it’s not always about money. Some people live perfectly happy lives working a day job and doing what they love on the side. It’s really about what feeds your energy and spirit. Maybe that’s what I need to write about 😉

      Much love,

      • Oh, I agree. I would never, ever personally work a 9-5 job, or for someone else. It would kill my soul! Sometimes, though, artists (especially introverted, insecure and/or unsupported ones) don’t “come into their own” until someone believes in them or supports them. By that time, they may very well have that spouse, mortgage and kid that they can’t just walk away from.

        Fortunately, Ron likes his job (even though they’re idiots and don’t pay him what he’s worth) because he’s able to be creative and inventive in his particular position.

        But yeah, starting out, I think artists and creatives need encouraged that they don’t HAVE to 9-5 it…but, not every person has the temperament to initiate or sustain an artistic career without a “real world” back up. I tell Noah that he can be an artist if he wants, but I think he sees the “reality” of having to pay for essentials. All I can do, as a Mom, is nurture that creative spark, but also give him practical tools to take care of himself. 🙂

      • Exactly! I feel the same way. 9-5 is so draining to my spirit. But I see the reality of it as well. I come from a similar situation. My mom is a single parent, and she is the most talented painter! Gosh she is so good… but unfortunately life got in the way of her pursuing art and sewing (she’s so good at that too). But she always instilled in me to follow my dreams.

        I think the thing that I hold so dear is how real my life has been. My mom never sugar coated anything. She always explained the bills to me. I always had to be self sufficient because there was no one to pick up the slack. But she is an RN now and she loves every second of it… so it really is about where you can feed your energy. She gives back to people and she gets to participate in my creative endeavors.

        For me it all boils down to the fact that my heart breaks for people her chase money instead of happiness because they believe that you can only have money by being unhappy! I want everyone to have a mother, spouse, friend, mentor who can push them in the direction to doing what they love 🙂

        Ron and Noah are lucky to have someone like you!! You are unconventional with your work and you are open and proud of it. And Noah get’s to see both sides of it. That’s a beautiful thing 😉

  2. You give me hope! I hope that Noah retains that creative fire and down-to-earthness, but doesn’t feel like he has to give up on any dreams to do so. Since he’s content to just do art privately, it may be enough just to have it nourish his soul.

    In my ideal world, artists and creatives would make the millions while the pro sports players and reality show jokes would be making minimum wage! 😛

  3. Wow! I felt this big shift reading your post, Shaheen. Something burst open and I’ve still got tears in my eyes. I’ve spent most of my life doing what other people thought I should and only recently have I started to explore the life I want. I’m now a Reiki practioner, crystal therapist and Tarot enthusiast, but had to seriously buck the familial trend to get there! (Divorce included.) I was made to feel selfish and unworthy, but in my heart I knew it was the only way to salvage my life. Thank you for confirming and putting into words so profoundly what many of us know but are afraid to dare.

    • Marcia, I’m trilled that this could offer some confirmation to you on your journey. It’s a difficult change that you’ve sought out to make, but I know you will be much happier because of it. You have to do what feeds your spirit, and makes you feel like your time and energy is being used for something meaningful.
      People get lost in their lives because they fight that same battle of doing what is expected vs. doing what they love. Keep reminding yourself that this is where your soul needs to be, and because of that all the other pieces will fall into place!
      Congratulations on your new adventure. I wish you lots of luck and success… doors will be sure to open 🙂


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s