Lately I have felt unable to write here. Sometimes writing to me is like being haunted, you can feel the presence of something looming, stalking, roaming somewhere behind you. I sometimes stop and ask, “what are you? What do you want to say?” But only when the ghost is ready does it answer.
Sometimes I write things and I read back and think, “wow that’s exactly how I feel!” and other times I look at the page, a little jaded, thinking my attempt to capture a feeling seems half hearted and worn out. But I gently remind myself that it’s all part of the journey and I just keep writing. I try to stay in motion.
Yesterday I spent time with a friend that I made here in London. He is a wonderful person. Though I’ve only known him for a short while, I can tell he is genuine… One of those people you can trust with anything.
Him and I spent the day at the market and then we had tea and talked in the park. We went to the market so I could get this bracelet I saw there a few days before. Its a silver cuff in the form of an owl that’s wings wrap around your wrist. I fell in love with her the first time I saw her and she stayed with me… So I had to go back and get her. After searching through stalls and stalls we finally found her again.
I wrote a poem about five years ago called the Haunting Owl. It was inspired by me seeing an owl in the daylight three distinct times all within a few days of each other. Now I feel like I’ve found her…in London. I will cherish this piece because it brings the spirit of that poem to life and it reminds me that there are those moments when the spirit of your words come to life and take flight.
So ending my day with my friend, we sat in the park by a church and talked about life and writing and music. We shared our stories, adding a much needed spark of inspiration to both of our lives. In the park were flowers and herbs and near to where we sat was a sage bush. It’s leaves were beautiful silver green and I spotted it the moment we sat down. I have always loved sage. I picked a few leaves, rubbed them together takin in their essence. Then gently tucked them into my journal as a symbol of cleansing and renewal.
It was a great day. Sometimes you need something in your life that just recharges you. It’s often the simple things. Time with a caring friend. The cool breeze of a park scented by sage. And a warm cup of mint tea.After all the rioting and the chaos that ensued I was left feeling a little abandoned and somewhat afraid. But I soon realized that I have a micro family here. People really showed they cared and it touched me. I feel more at ease now and yesterday helped bring me back to center.
I looked at my calendar this morning. I only have a few weeks left here and now I feel I will truly miss it. It has been magical, emotional and life changing. I’ve seen so much in such a short time. Another chapter of my life has been written, another facet to my journey. I came here to grow and I have and London will always be a part of me.
I hope all of you are doing well. Give me an update. Share your stories with me. I hope no matter what your doing… I hope your still dreaming. The worlds big, it’s badass and sometimes it pulls us under, but if you keep sight of something with meaning you will make it.
“I watched it burn. I watched them learn. I watched us pull from the ash something of change. I watched them cry. I watched them laugh. I watched them love again. So the haunting owl whispered on the wind.”
(c) Shaheen Miro 8/15/2011